Crying was my most constant companion. One day, walking on the beach after a sleepless night, I saw the reflection of the sun on the water. Inexplicably, I felt a sense of a Presence larger than life itself after seeing a patch of light differently than ever before. The light image kept me alive... I was suffused with love...It felt comforting, life-changing and dramatic, but peaceful. Although I couldn't rationally explain it, I lost the desire to die.
The center of our union with God is on a deeper level than mind or intellect. It is in the very center of existence, which could be called the will-to-God. This will is a silent faculty; it does not think, speak, remember or form images ... To know the will of God, we have only to remain silent, remain in the still center which, automatically, without a single thought, is the present acceptance of the present moment, and what we are at the moment ... The secret of the unitive life is the graced ability to live in this passive silence of our will running into God's will, a silence which is always here and now, and always one with God. The truest communication with God is absolute, total silence; there is not a single word in existence that can convey this communication.