Meeting and greeting the Presence within happens in all degrees of intensity... One day the silence may suddenly, automatically deepen -- like a car going into overdrive -- when you effortlessly remain in the deepest relaxation, undistracted, receptive. In this state you may feel the love going out from you and coming back to you and you may feel within you a sudden walling-up of glowing happiness or intense, vibrant joy. You may find yourself smiling as you realize you are meeting and being met, as you know you are experiencing the Presence.
For me, the question is whether my encounter with death has freed me enough from the addictions of the world that I can be true to my vocation as I now see it "sent" from above. It clearly involves a call to prayer, contemplation, silence, solitude, and inner detachment. I have to keep choosing my "not belonging" in order to belong, my not being from below in order to be from above. For, the taste of God's unconditional love quickly disappears when the addictive powers of everyday existence make their presence felt again.